What the fuck ever anymore

I woke up today and everything was ok.

I just got to thinking .... why am I always being put down by my boyfriend?

I don't look like a malnourished orphan, and my mohawk is not a fin. I mean if he said it once or twice fine. but last night malnourished was every other word out of his mouth. like what the actual fuck.
seriously. i thought he was supposed to make me happy, make me feel better when others put me down.

instead, nobody else puts me down. just him.

like what the fuck.

Damn...

I just screw up everything.

Alex unfriended me....
Kyle won't talk to me....
Chris won't talk to me....
My current boyfriend is probably thinking about breaking up with me...

I just can't fucking do relationships. What the hell. I suck at this.

Someone teach me how to do this. :'(

...........
i feel like i over react to everything

i feel like i can't do anything right though

i just kinda feel like i'm losing the person i wanted to get closer and closer to =/

what the actual fuck

i might love him

but why should that stop me from loving you at all

why

what the hell

FUCK MY LIFE SO MUCH
why
i just wanted one thing to work out for once
just one
but i can't even have a good relationship apparently.
i fucked this one up before i even met him.
what the hell.
i give the fuck up.

God Damnit

i'm sorry i loved someone
i'm sorry i showed someone 1000miles away everything i have.
i'm sorry i let him build me back up in life
he's my best friend
i've never met him
but i don't have to to know how much he cares

i'm sorry you made me feel like shit about all of it.

fuck this.